Face-Rocking Covers #3: Thor
Every Friday, Baddie hits you with face-rocking comic book covers that could inspire you to say either “HOLY FUCK, THAT’S AWESOME!!!” or “WTF, ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!” Whether it’s the awesomest of all awesome covers that ever awesomed, or the shittiest of all crappy covers that ever took a dump, if it’s face-rocking, it’s in here.
In celebration of Thor’s return, this week’s Face-Rocking Covers post features covers of Journey into Mystery, which was renamed “Thor” after the God of Thunder’s adventures reached a god-like popularity. IT’S HAMMER TIME!
What does Loki, Thor’s half-brother and nemesis, do when he’s out of tricks and plots to bring down the God of Thunder? He outsources. Thor: “Foul-smelling creature! I want to talk to thy supervisor! And why art thou pink?! Art thou homosexual?!”
Sometimes, Thor’s battles with his awesome enemies become so epic that innocent human lives get entangled in the chaos of flying mystical hammers and giant metallic hands. Check out the dude on the lower left part of the cover. Dude’s clearly freaked out. He’s all like “Fuck this shit, I’m going home!”
Thor: “Can thy Jesus do this?! Methinks NOT!”
Hey, Thor. Don’t mind Captain America. He’s probably dead, anyway. Don’t mind the half-naked hot chick wrapped around your legs too. You just keep Cap’s shield. You need it more than a fallen comrade and a frail damsel in distress. What’s that? “God of Douchebaggery”? Yes. Yes, you are.
Odin: “Whut?! Waddaya *hic* want?! Don’t you judge me! YOU DON’T *hic* KNOW ME! And stay away from my wife! And get *hic* me another bottle of hooch! I love you, son. *hic*”
Thor: “Hush, Mjolnir! Lest he hears us. Tee-hee!”
Awesome gun, Son of Odin. But may I just remind you that you have an enchanted hammer THAT CAN SUMMON LIGHTNING BOLTS!!!
“Unusual” doesn’t even begin to describe it. It’s downright dumb! And you know what’s dumber? Thor-Frog…
…IN ACTION! Just look at the total amazement on Loki’s face. He doesn’t know whether to slap his forehead or to burst out laughing.
Welcome back, Thor! Bash some heads, rock some faces, and try not to turn into a frog this time! FORSOOTH!
- Thor: God of Metal
- Face-Rocking Covers #4: Green Lantern
- Face-Rocking Covers #7: What If? & What The–?!
- Face-Rocking Covers #6: Birds of Prey
- Face-Rocking Covers #1: Transformers
- Face-Rocking Covers #5: The Hulk
- Face-Rocking Covers #12: Iron Man
- Face-Rocking Covers #2: Uncanny X-Men
- Face-Rocking Covers #10: Crisis on Infinite Earths
- Face-Rocking Covers #8: Supergirl
13 Jul 07 8:34 pm
And they call Marvel “The House of Ideas”? More like “The House of Potheads”!
14 Jul 07 2:04 am
Or “The Hou..” yeah “The House of Potheads” sounds right.
16 Jul 07 12:39 pm
Damn outsourced pink Indian Gods! I bet communication gap initiated the fight between them.
17 Jul 07 10:09 am
Or Thor’s just homophobic.